Live Love
Okay so The Live Love Day adventure is over. Last week I spent the week sorting tools and packing boxes with paint supplies etc. My sister was here (in Chandler,AZ) with me yet she got a nasty cold so was down for the count most of the time.
On the actual day of Live Love I was able to be used in registration, a gofer for the tools etc. helping to delegate tasks for teenagers who came to help and then was put in charge of one of the two block parties which was to celebrate that we had been in the community and to help the communities get to know one another.
Over all it was a good experience...but I feel something is missing...
I am reading a book right now called "True Religion" by Palmer Chinchen the pastor of my friend's local church called "The Grove" and he describes an "Expatriate" like this:
"Becoming the expatriate involves a new way of living, a new way of thinking, a new way of believing, a new way of dreaming.
I've observed something true in practically all expats. Once they have tasted haphazard, horn honking, chickens-everywhere, annoying-vendors, pungent-odor,soggy-air, crazed-taxi-drivers,drunken-policemen,disorienting,take-life-as-it-comes world away from home they want more.
When expatriates return "home" their souls shrivel. They cringe at chain anything. The suburbs and minivans and strip malls and fast food suck their spirits dry. They can't wait to board the next plane to somewhere far and away." pg 52
So this sums it up...where I am at...I just feel restless. The need to help is so great. my ability to share the gospel is so ready and yet I am in America waiting for the right person and the right organization and the right timing and the right this and that and frankly I am feeling all shriveled up. Like I want to hide in a hole and hibernate until January 12th. Now I know when I am there is is not easy either it is not like I get to exchange discomfort for comfort or the other way around but I guess maybe it comes down to purpose and in the US I feel like I cannot seem to find mine...am I now on the constant pursuit of having a "purpose driven life" oh gosh there is so much in my bones that never, ever wants to be a statistic but maybe that is just what I am with a less fearful way of living so I will go but then will I be stuck again...
Well to say the least I feel like I am in a rut...where do I go, what do I do, and can I close my eyes and wake up in hot and sticky, smelly, loss of electricity for the 5th time today, slow internet and starchy food Zimbabwe...I mean seriously is that want I want....
....okay so not all hope it lost...God has not forsaken me and I am not alone...but man oh man how I feel that the desires of my heart he has put in there are so miss-understood in (North)America...AND I am sure you feel this way sometimes too...you just don't have a blog to whine to the world about it...
Okay so here is to a life filled with an over-flowing abundance of love to the place of being able to just be still...AND know...
On the actual day of Live Love I was able to be used in registration, a gofer for the tools etc. helping to delegate tasks for teenagers who came to help and then was put in charge of one of the two block parties which was to celebrate that we had been in the community and to help the communities get to know one another.
Over all it was a good experience...but I feel something is missing...
I am reading a book right now called "True Religion" by Palmer Chinchen the pastor of my friend's local church called "The Grove" and he describes an "Expatriate" like this:
"Becoming the expatriate involves a new way of living, a new way of thinking, a new way of believing, a new way of dreaming.
I've observed something true in practically all expats. Once they have tasted haphazard, horn honking, chickens-everywhere, annoying-vendors, pungent-odor,soggy-air, crazed-taxi-drivers,drunken-policemen,disorienting,take-life-as-it-comes world away from home they want more.
When expatriates return "home" their souls shrivel. They cringe at chain anything. The suburbs and minivans and strip malls and fast food suck their spirits dry. They can't wait to board the next plane to somewhere far and away." pg 52
So this sums it up...where I am at...I just feel restless. The need to help is so great. my ability to share the gospel is so ready and yet I am in America waiting for the right person and the right organization and the right timing and the right this and that and frankly I am feeling all shriveled up. Like I want to hide in a hole and hibernate until January 12th. Now I know when I am there is is not easy either it is not like I get to exchange discomfort for comfort or the other way around but I guess maybe it comes down to purpose and in the US I feel like I cannot seem to find mine...am I now on the constant pursuit of having a "purpose driven life" oh gosh there is so much in my bones that never, ever wants to be a statistic but maybe that is just what I am with a less fearful way of living so I will go but then will I be stuck again...
Well to say the least I feel like I am in a rut...where do I go, what do I do, and can I close my eyes and wake up in hot and sticky, smelly, loss of electricity for the 5th time today, slow internet and starchy food Zimbabwe...I mean seriously is that want I want....
....okay so not all hope it lost...God has not forsaken me and I am not alone...but man oh man how I feel that the desires of my heart he has put in there are so miss-understood in (North)America...AND I am sure you feel this way sometimes too...you just don't have a blog to whine to the world about it...
Okay so here is to a life filled with an over-flowing abundance of love to the place of being able to just be still...AND know...
Hi Justine - maybe God wants you to learn Phil 4:10-13 and verse 11 in particular
Reply to this
Thank you Mike...I struggled to see what you might be having me learn and after studying various versions I have had help to understand the relevance to my situation.
Yesterday I was able to talk with my best friend in Africa and was also able to speak with a local woman who is from Malawi. It gave me peace. I feel, yes I need to be better at being at peace in all situations as it is Christ who strengthens me not people. So as I grow in Christ this will be my hearts greatest desire!
Thank you for your direction to scripture!
Philippians 4:10-13 (Amplified Bible)
10I was made very happy in the Lord that now you have revived your interest in my welfare after so long a time; you were indeed thinking of me, but you had no opportunity to show it.
11Not that I am implying that I was in any personal want, for I have learned how to be content (satisfied to the point where I am not disturbed or disquieted) in whatever state I am.
12I know how to be abased and live humbly in straitened circumstances, and I know also how to enjoy plenty and live in abundance. I have learned in any and all circumstances the secret of facing every situation, whether well-fed or going hungry, having a sufficiency and enough to spare or going without and being in want.
13I have strength for all things in Christ Who empowers me [I am ready for anything and equal to anything through Him Who infuses inner strength into me; I am [self-sufficient in Christ's sufficiency].
Philippians 4:10-13 (English Standard Version)
God’s Provision
10I rejoiced in the Lord greatly that now at length you have revived your concern for me. You were indeed concerned for me, but you had no opportunity. 11Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. 12I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and(hunger, abundance and need. 13I can do all things through him who strengthens me.
Reply to this