JUSTINESADVENTURES.COM

Victory for Christ: Sue

2012-05-15T12:21:16Z

Yesterday as the drop in opened and the rush of people poured in off the streets, their many faces and stories found a place to sit and started to enjoy veggie soup and a hotdog... I was quickly ushered into my office by a familiar face. Sue (not her real name but she has given me permission to share her story) Says to me, "Justine! Justine! I NEED to talk to you..."

"Okay Sue I am coming, let me grab a coffee..."

I often spend a portion of the 3 hours our drop in is open counselling women...even when the time is not long the content is so very thick it often feels like we have been talking for hours.

Sue has shared many horrible things with me, years of incest at her father and then step father's hands. Sold into prostitution at age 17 and a year later the first of her children was born. She tells how the father of her two younger children has held her down and let his friends do unimaginable things to her, this in between beatings and years of emotional abuse.

"So Justine is this what you meant?" She hands a thin notebook to me with the centre of the book obviously creased open from being held in this place for a long while.

I start to read; very neat printing right up to the lines like they teach you in kindergarten, 'I repent for..., I ask God to...., I promise I will never...

"...Is this what you meant when you told me to do a devotion to God?"

About 2 weeks ago in our twice a week Overcomers in Christ Meeting the topic was 'Devotion'. I felt led that day to take one of the New Testament Bibles we have for giving out, give one to each of the participants, give them a coloured marker and we wrote some steps from the Overcomers manual on how to do a devotion in the front cover and I sent them all home with this bible and a Daily Bread Devotional.

When we plant seeds we never know whose soil is ready and whose seed might get blown away or whose might go into hibernation for a season.

"Well Sue, devotion is just spending time with God"

"Yes I did that last night I spent from 11pm- 1am with Him just talking to Him and praying and asking if Jesus would help me. I went to church yesterday and there were so many people who were so happy to see me!"

"So Sue your relationship with Jesus is the most important, if you are able to admit you are a sinner- which you have done in this notebook, then the next step is to admit you cannot do life alone and you want Jesus to be the Lord of your life, you want Him to rule and you will trust Him."

"YES, I know.... that is what I did last night,don't you know..."

"Oh!"

Here I was trying to take baby steps to ensure that this woman who openly professed two weeks ago, "well, I don't believe in God, but I don't not believe." understood that Jesus was alive and WANTED to be her friend!

The conversation went on, she gleamed from her face; Sue has dark chocolate skin and if I could adequately describe what it looked like lite up you would get goose bumps!...I cannot tell you, the smile on her face as she went on and on about how Jesus loved her and he wanted to help her it was amazing. She even asked if having sex with the father of her one child who she is not married to(but in an emotionally abusive situation with) was sin; and I did not have to answer her she did that herself...

With tears in my eyes I told her,"Sue if I have come to Halifax, just to watch you grow with God, my time here will be worthwhile!"

Later in the afternoon, she was at a table and called me over, "Justine! Justine!" she said in a loud and excited whisper as she looked about suspiciously, "Justine is is okay...," she looked around again, "if I read my bible here?"

She looked very concerned," You see not everyone here is a Christian, is it okay?"

"Oh my sweet girl, it is just fine, you can read your bible anywhere...and even when you are not reading your bible He will be with you!"

* * *

I drove home yesterday, smelling like coffee and hotdogs, I was tired, but I was content...

'Oh Lord Jesus, bring more souls to us and give us the wisdom to minister to them, raise up a community of Christians here in Halifax that are so on fire for your Love we are contagious...Let your Wild Love flow in this place and most deeply in my heart! AMEN!'

My Story: for Westwood Baptist Ladies Newsletter

2012-05-12T12:52:50Z

The day started as usual. I arrived at the mission in the Skid row of Halifax. The routine was as followed: I turned on the coffee, set the tables, started to heat lunch and waited for the lost souls of Halifax to trickle through the door.

At the end of the day, after many exciting tasks such as re-arranging the kitchen, filling the sugar at least two times, placing about 50 donuts on the tables, watching the regulars play just one more round of crib, serving up many bowls of soup as well as hotdogs, and counseling women who are haunted by incest, rape and addiction, just to name a few, I was able to reflect on the day’s events while scraping the bottom of the crockpot into the compost bin.

Did I really expect to be here? HOW did I get here? WOW, this is so not my plan…it can only be His. Here I was, standing beside this building, looking into this big, green bin… the smell of compost food wafting towards me…yep, this is my life and, for the most part, I LOVE IT!

When I was young, we attended a Lutheran church. Got dressed up and "did" church! My parents finally divorced when I was at the tender age of 9 and my sister was 13 years old.

Both my sister and I dutifully attended the confirmation class. I quickly realized that I did not want man to define why I was a Christian. Going through the process of writing an essay titled "Why I am a Christian" and having the pastor cross red lines through it for weeks on end, did not cut it for me. In fact, I was not a Christian for I had not yet met Jesus. For all I knew, he was just the baby born at Christmas, Mary became pregnant through the power of the Holy Spirit and God was a booming voice in the sky…I left the church.

At 12 years old, I found out I had scoliosis. Combine that with the loss of my father, whom I did not see from age nine to twenty-six, I became a bit of a mess. A few years later, after months of a body brace and major spinal surgery, I started to wash down handfuls of prescription pain meds and sleeping pills with wine in between packages of cigarettes. I smoked for 15 years and abruptly quite the day I left for Africa as a Missionary! However, in the years leading up to the radical move, I tried everything under the sun to get that dull ache of loneliness and depression out of me. I tried it all…meditation, Buddhism, sufi whirling, yoga, shri chin moy, anything ancient and eastern, Oprah, Eckhart Tolle. You name it, I tried it! I believed it would bring me to enlightenment. But guess what? It brought me deeper into a black hole of depression. So on with use of alcohol and prescription drugs I went.

Upon graduating with my BA in Psychology (for what messed up person does not want to help others, eh?) and working in group foster homes for two years, I went on disability for almost six years all the while attempting to continue to put myself back together. At age 25, I began work as a Doula, teaching prenatal classes, educating in breastfeeding, and attending labor and postpartum. From a seed planted a few years earlier, I now realized this was my passion. I quickly built a thriving business bringing to my life refreshment, happiness and success. I now felt I had found what I was meant to do. Yet, somehow, my heart remained empty.

Living independently and released from the pain medication addiction, I still was drinking and smoking to get by and keep me from boredom. At that time, my best friend, a Christian, and I had actually agreed not to talk about Christianity anymore for I was very hostile and anti-Christian. She did mention to me she was going to an Alpha course to lead a table with her husband. Although she did not invite me, I did actually invited myself!

The sessions began with the topic of how we know Jesus is real. I had always been stuck on the walking on water story. Mind you, I have a degree…no one can walk on water! It HAD to make sense to my HUMAN mind...we talked a bit about this and I remained very hostile. That evening, upon arriving at home, my dear friend called me. I expressed my doubt in Jesus walking on water. She continued to explain that Jesus was supernatural. The thought occurred to me that, if I can believe in reincarnation, I guess I could believe in the supernatural Jesus. She proceeded to explain faith and, in this instance, I felt my brain re-wiring like a light bulb going off! After the call ended, I asked God, "If you are real, and I don't think you are, show yourself to me!" In that instance I had to turn around and felt compelled to look out the window. The best way to described what I felt was as if the space between the two houses filled and there was this presence. Overwhelmed, I rushed to my room to hide under my sheets and say a prayer, asking God to protect me. The next day, I asked my friend how to get to her church and I have been sold out for Jesus since!

My sister then led me to Stormie Omartian’s book, Power of a Praying Woman. Every night, I would read a chapter and pray the prayer in bed. When I got to the "God Use Me for Your Will" chapter, I read and reread it for about a week. "I will go anywhere and do anything God. Help to prepare me today for what you have for me tomorrow. Plants seeds that will bear good fruit." Less than a year later I was in Africa starting a YWAM Discipleship Training School and I celebrated my 30th birthday on the coast off the southern Tip of Africa!

So here I am today, no more drinking and smoking. While in Mozambique, God called me to not date for two years so men have been out of the picture, that is until June 23. (Yep, I’ve got that date down!) I have just had God and holiness to focus on...each day I know I grow more towards him and yet, there is so far to go. I know he has a great plan for me and I only want to be obedient to that!

Upon returning from 2 years of ministry in Africa, through an online university internship, I am currently working in Skid Row in Halifax, Nova Scotia. Just 3.5 years after Jesus became my friend, I am here working full time at a local Homeless mission and soup kitchen while taking online courses to receive an Additions Studies Degree.

Did I even think I would end up in that lane staring into that green bin with the smell of composting food lingering towards me…never in my life! What I have learned most is that obedience is key. As Christians, we need to live counter-cultural. We need to fear God more than we fear man. We need to love Jesus more than we love ourselves. We need to allow the Holy Spirit to convict and guide and THEN, the best part, we get to show others what He has done!

“Daddy, I pray for all the women who will read ‘My Story.’ I pray you will show them it is actually YOUR story. You took an unlovable and hurting addict and transformed her into a woman who can reflect your glory. God, I pray you will stir hearts, for those who have heard your voice to ‘do more’ or even for those to ‘do less,’ that you would be in their hearts, you would love them more than their children or their husbands can…your unconditional love would come and heal all the hurts that are so real. I pray for the people on the streets in Halifax, that you would provide your love through Souls Harbour Rescue Mission to them. I pray that they could be changed through your love. I pray this in your son’s amazing name, AMEN!”

What I have in common with the 'Marginalized'...

2012-05-12T12:37:46Z

One of my first posts in South Africa was titled” What I have in common with a Prostitute” I was doing some local street ministry and I found myself sitting on the curb; the grey and dirty street rippled with some clear broken glass I tried to avoid as I got down and sat with a young woman. I was able to speak with her and hear her story and I was able to relate to her. I had lived without my father for 17 years and now I could share this experience with this young girl who too desired to get reconcile with her father and get off the streets.

* * *

Having been in Halifax for just under 8 weeks it has been a real roller coaster ride. My expectations have been met in very different ways…what I thought would be… has not been, and I have had to fall deeply into my Father God’s arms as I realize I am here by His will and His will must be done.

I am challenged in many ways. Primarily, I strive to meet with people who understand what it is like to live out of two suitcases and at the generosity of others, people who understand what it means to have been touched so deeply, to the very core, to that raw burning inside by a LOVE that heals and restores and touches oh so deeply to places you never knew needed a touch AND then to desire to share that WILD LOVE with others.

I just finished reading a most moving book called, “The Wild Love of God” by Chris Dupre on page 140 he wrote this:

A heart that knows the Father’s affection is a heart at rest. No longer is performance the driving force of life. People at rest have nothing to prove. Nothing I can do will affect His affection for me or change His love to me. My love, my obedience, my very life turns from being my Christian duty and instead becomes what it was meant to be: a response of a heart overflowing with love. Freely received, freely given. There’s nothing more pure that when love is freely given, no string attached.

You see I have come to Halifax to, as Heidi Baker would say, to “Love the unlovables”. Yes, I am here to LOVE…and what do I have in common with these people I am here to love…well first off, I need to remind myself that it is often not just the ones I come to minister to who need this love. I have found in the past few weeks that EVERYONE in Halifax needs this love, my pastor, my friends, my grocery store clerk…oh we are all crying out for this love in some way or another!

My time at the mission has gone from, coming home at the end of the day going “this is it?”… to waking in the morning and eagerly awaiting when I can get there, get the smell of hotdogs and coffee in my hair and play a game of crib with the very lonely people I now call my friends. I have heard horrible stories of incest and of abandon and rape. The women open up to me more that one can handle at times, I often find myself in my office with one of them and we are just praying….how can I, little ‘ol me, help these deep hurts…well I can’t only He can…

So this week I led Chapel Time at the mission. I decided to share in the 10mins a snapshot of what God has done in my life (I will post next an article I wrote for my sister’s Church newsletter which gives a bit more detail) I shared about how I come from a broken family, one that did not understand the true meaning of why we went to church, I was started on medication at age 9 and ended an addiction to prescription drugs at age 27, who at age 29 quit a 15 year addiction with cigarettes and who at, I would say, maybe even age 32 put my foot down on alcohol…Who has allowed God to be my father when I did not know what that role was supposed to be, who has allowed Jesus to walk along side of me and hold my hand, and who really only does great things when I allow the Holy Spirit to be my power…

After Chapel Time was over and all heads turned back to crib, or gossip, or another cup of coffee, I felt in obedience to Him I had shared with these people what I have in common with them…I was lonely, I was scared, I was bored, and I was overwhelmed by what this world told me I needed to be and do and I FINALLY said okay I CANNOT do it on my own and I started a life of surrender and a life of LOVE. Many people came to me that day and shared more of their lives with me and thanked me for sharing mine.

Daily I am humbled by the people I serve, at times my heart breaks and I go home and pray for them and YES we are seeing some victory in their lives but overall I profess once again that for me to be on mission with God I must DAILY surrender and allow Him into my dark places to heal me up so HIS love shines through the cracks of my humanity.

Murder in Halifax

2012-04-19T12:36:44Z

Photos from the Cowboy Easter Dinner

http://alturl.com/izm3a

In the neighborhood I work in, just two days ago, there was a murder. Please be praying for the safety and peace of those whom I minister to on a daily basis who live in this area.

In the past two week I have been "running the show" at the mission as the Mission Director is away. I have served as Host, Manager, Coordinator, Counsellor, Chef, Organizer... you name it I have worn many hats.

The most interesting part of it has been the ministry to women. Last week I had three women in one day come to my office for prayer and counsel two of them as adults live with the pain and scars of years of incest and sexual molestation. My heart breaks for these women and I know we are called to love. No matter what the crime, what the sin a person has done..it is a bit cliche but I do believe in "hate the sin love the sinner"...I mean even Jesus did this for all of us, Romans 5:8 "while we were sinners Jesus died for us" His love goes deeper than anything we can do as humans, but daily I am called to let his love in deeper to heal me even more and then to let that love shine out of me...this is the meaning of missions for me...

I pray for my new community of people I am getting to know and having the honour to minister to that the Lord will guide me with his wisdom and grace to help these people heal and most of all to experience the LOVE that is unconditional from our caring Papa!

To Read more about what happened click the link:

Murder in Halifax

How Alpha showed me Jesus is alive!

2012-04-08T21:50:11Z

Filmed at a annual conference in Halifax on March 25th

Happy Easter From a Snowy Halifax!

2012-04-08T21:46:40Z

This was at Citadel Hill at 6:30am today! I drove in the snow to get to the special Easter Sunday service overlooking the city.

Extra! Extra! Read all about it!

2012-04-01T19:24:33Z

MEDIA ADVISORY FOR CONTACT: Michelle Porter

Saturday, April 7, 2012 PHONE: 902-405-HOME (4663)

Noon

SOULS HARBOUR RESCUE MISSION

HOSTS A COWBOW THEMED EASTER DINNER FOR THE POOR

**********

1200 homemade meatballs. 84 packages of healthy whole wheat spagetti. 75 jars of sauce. 33 kg of baked beans.

300 johnny cakes. 300 mini cupcakes from Lisa’s Bakery. 300 edible table favours by Fruitful Expressions.

**********

WHO:SOULS HARBOUR RESCUE MISSION to serve a 3-course Easter dinner for up to 300

needy men, women, and children in our community.

Sponsored by Bluewave Energy, Fruitful Expressions, Hart & Thistle Gastropub, Lisa’s Bakery, Miracles Christian Store, & the generous donors of SHRM.

WHAT: Cowboy themed Easter dinner, dinner music, and Hope Totes to take home!

WHEN: Saturday, April 7th, 2012 at 12:00 Noon

WHERE: 5568 Cunard Street (between Gottingen and The Armoury) Halifax, NS

Souls Harbour RESCUE Mission

WHY: “As Christians, Easter is our most important holiday. This celebration of the Resurrection is too good to keep to ourselves. That’s why we have a special feast to which everyone can come!” says Michelle Porter, Executive Director, Souls Harbour RESCUE Mission.

PHOTO/ INTERVIEW OPPORTUNITIES:

Ken & Michelle Porter, Co-Founders of Souls Harbour RESCUE Mission, can talk about why they began this new ministry to the poor of Halifax and this inaugural holiday dinner.

Volunteers and board members talk about why they serve the homeless and hungry.

Justine Pearson, our new intern from Vancouver, can talk about why she left everything to come and serve the poor in Halifax for the next 12 months.

Dinner guests can be asked to do interviews about what the meal means to them.

Souls Harbour RESCUE Mission exists to rescue people from poverty, addiction and despair, by offering emergency help, such as food, clothing and shelter, life-changing recovery programs, and the Gospel Message. They are a member of the AGRM and local Chamber of Commerce.

Souls Harbour RESCUE Mission facebook page: http://www.facebook.com/shrm.ca

Souls Harbour RESCUE Mission giving page: http://www.shrm.ca

Arriving in Halifax (this should have been posted March 25th!)

2012-03-31T12:59:31Z

Taking your bike on the plane is not an easy task!

With a bomby 30 degrees this week I am happy to say I am officially a resident of Halifax Nova Scotia. I am on Atlantic time 4 hrs ahead of PST and guess what…there are Starbucks, Canadian flags, and Petro Canada stations, and the mail boxes look the same as in Vancouver!!

Being that I have lived in ‘developing’ Africa it was a bit anticlimactic to travel within my own country and know I was going away as a missionary. The domestic airport in Vancouver was so uneventful and I got on my flight without ever showing my passport! Can you imagine?

After arriving in Montreal at 1am to an empty airport and sleeping on a bench for 4 hrs I woke to a bustling crowded place…upon removing my earplugs and in a bit of a daze all I could hear was FRENCH!!! It was a bit shocking and as I turned around and saw a Second Cup coffee shop I still knew I was in Canada.

It feels so very ‘normal’ to be here…I guess my time in Africa was so ‘abnormal’ on a daily basis and challenged and stretched me in ways I never knew I could go; being in my own country on missions is a BIG change for me…not that I do not expect to be challenged and stretched!

I was picked up by Michelle one of the founders of the mission and we went right away to see where is all happens…when I walked in during lunch time to the mission the tables were full with homeless people chowing away and laughing. Michelle introduced me and a lovely, yet a little rough around the edges, lady hollers out “You ain’t from around here are you honey!?” my heart sunk, do I really stick out like a sore thumb??? I mean, I have never worked with homeless and addicts before how will I ever fit in? I asked her how she knew she said it was my accent and ‘the way I carried myself’.

The rest of the day was filled with some exploration of Halifax and of course we had fish and chips for lunch and got to tour the first ‘tall ship’ of the season from Venezuela which had arrived. It was a fun and light day which was good since I was mightily tired.

First "Tall Ship" of the season

Michelle and I Demo some items we got at the harbour for a fundraiser

That night I met “The Doctors”- my host family. They are amazing! They have 3 adult children and they run a singles home group on Tuesday nights in the house. They have attended Iris ministries in Pemba Mozambique where I did my school and they eat exactly what I do…lots of healthy stuff!

All in all it just feels so normal. I have taken my bike to the shop to be reassembled. There are MASSIVE long hills and inclines here so my dream of biking to and from work may be thwarted a few months until I am fit enough but I am thrilled to be here and to be on Mission in God’s will!

Tomorrow I get trained at how to run the drop in center and lunch program and then we have a big push to organize for our 300 homeless person Easter Dinner which will be so much fun!

Thanks to all of you who have me in your prayers and who have contributed financially to the work God has me doing!

View from Michelle's Condo- one of the two major bridges to Dartmouth

Oh the Places you will Go...

2012-03-17T17:15:28Z

I borrow my inspiration to reflect and write today from an inspiring missionary friend Laura in Rwanda and from an old friend to all Dr. Seuss.

I am reminded today that I have chosen to go in. To go into the places that not many go. As a human being we are given choice to go in. To meet with our Lord and Saviour. To we washed clean for all that horrible stuff we have done. The lies and betrayal, the manipulation and shame, the need to be more and bigger and better we can come to know a Father who loves us DEEPLY, I mean real deep.

Once we go in we then have another choice...we as Christians can dive in deep we can get consumed by His love, or we can wait at the edge of the pool toe in... toe out...testing the water until it gets just right.

I will tell you today as I have just 3 more sleeps until I leave what I know as my life in Vancouver to go to a place where I know noone but the One who sends me that the water NEVER gets just right....we need to jump in...we need to abandon that which we cling to that we think will hold us up and help us not to sink...we need to live and love in this abandoned place and that is when we can go from trying and proving and surviving to true freedom and true life...

"Oh the Places you will Go"

You will come to a place where the streets are not marked.

Some windows are lighted. But mostly they're darked.

A place you could sprain both your elbow and chin!

Do you dare to stay out? Do you dare to go in?

How much can you lose? How much can you win?

And IF you go in, should you turn left or right...

or right-and-three-quarters? Or, maybe, not quite?

Or go around back and sneak in from behind?

Simple it's not, I'm afraid you will find,

for a mind-maker-upper to make up his mind.

You can get so confused

that you'll start in to race

down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace

and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space,

headed, I fear, toward a most useless place.

The Waiting Place...

...for people just waiting.

Waiting for a train to go

or a bus to come, or a plane to go

or the mail to come, or the rain to go

or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow

or waiting around for a Yes or a No

or waiting for their hair to grow.

Everyone is just waiting.

Waiting for the fish to bite

or waiting for wind to fly a kite

or waiting around for Friday night

or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake

or a pot to boil, or a Better Break

or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants

or a wig with curls, or Another Chance.

Everyone is just waiting.

NO!

That's not for you!

Somehow you'll escape

all that waiting and staying.

You'll find the bright places

where Boom Bands are playing.

With banner flip-flapping,

once more you'll ride high!

Ready for anything under the sky.

Ready because you're that kind of a guy!

Can you hear YOUR music?

2012-03-02T17:16:51Z

Sometimes I don’t feel like I am living my life…okay this could be a deep thought from Justine or just could be ALL the cold medicine I am doped up on but hear me out a bit here…

I am on the Train from Olympia Washington to Vancouver,B.C. (well I am posting this the morning after) for a short…oh gosh I don’t know what to call it anymore- visit-break-rest-hello-goodbye…

I often have said that life would be so much more fun if our “theme music” would just play…you know like when you get a promotion at work and the bells chimed (“we are the champions…”) and all the people slowed down…like slow mo and they all looked at YOU and high fived you…or say you get on a train to not see your family for a long time and as you stare out the train window to watch the sun set over a bridge with puffy, thick, ominous clouds you would hear that nice violin and piano come on and you would see the half smile of the person in the train and you would long for it…well…

I often also thought that my music would never really play…like it was something Hollywood made me long for and yet life was just well …life… that what I had thought was the ideal life you know the cool, 2.2 kids, chocolate lab(that would be the perfect dog if you were wondering), two car garage and a summer home by the lake life was ideal… that my music would never play… well guess what…I have NONE of that and…dundda dunndda! I heard my music today…YEP I heard it…

I, me, Justine Pearson, 32year old, single, dirty blond (yes it is still blonde okay!) Child of God, have heard my theme music and it kinda shocked me, it made me feel like I was not really living my own life…like it was a dream or something. Now I have to tell you I am SUPER sick right now have been for 2 weeks and frankly all I want to do is go to a place I KNOW and sleep for about 2 months…yet I have an exciting and brief 2.5 weeks left in Vancouver before I jet set to Halifax, Nova Scotia to live with “THE DOCTORS” (yes I say this with a big booming voice) - whom I have never met nor know anything about but have offered to house me while I assist the very brand spanking new ‘Souls Harbour Union Gospel Mission’ to get established. I will be serving 35 hours a week in exchange for housing, food (which I understand will be in the soup kitchen most of the time) and 10 courses towards a degree in Addiction Studies(through an online College in the US) which will help to equip me to serve the main target group the Union Gospel serves…and my music plays on…

Since I learned I was not going to stay in Zimbabwe I have kinda been half in my life… like I knew what to do , I mean you just follow God right??…and then once I got back to North America it has been a daze… and now from the daze-oh I hear it… I hear the sweet, sweet sound of music- IN SURROUND SOUND!, all the violins and pianos in harmony…perfect harmony…YOU JUST FOLLOW GOD…that is what you do NO MATTER WHAT…

I feel like saying “I have no idea what I am doing”, that would be a bit dramatic (yep me dramatic…can you imagine???!!?) But I do know what I am doing I mean I may not know what my 5 year or 10 year plan looks like, but in 2.5 weeks I will get on a plane to start a new chapter in Halifax, Nova Scotia and you know what is the coolest??? …when God is the author the music is better than anything you could have imagined!

Here’s to’ Fosh and Chops’, fishermen, lighthouses, and best of all Souls for the Kingdom with a daily dose of surrender…

Did I mention I caught a baby in Mozambeque?

2012-01-15T06:08:25Z

One year ago today I arrived in South Africa on route to Zimbabwe...what I have learned is that "Dreams are not just meant for dreaming about 8they are mean for living!"

* * *

Since I have been back I have been taking some time to just rest and kinda zone out a bit. I started watching the series “Lost” and there is a woman who is 9 months pregnant on the stranded island. They have a doctor, but of course they do not want to have to deliver the baby. In fact the doctor said in the first few days, “we have no IV’s or Ultra Sounds we have no way to deliver this baby”

I think I forgot to blog about the fact I delivered a baby in Mozambique… this is how it went…

I was working in a medical clinic, I was on call with the midwife who I was teaching English too in exchange she was going to teach me to catch a baby.

We got called to the clinic about 8:45pm. We arrived and a 19year old woman was there with her mother-in-law who had her own son with her who was just under two years and still nursing (culturally women start their families young and keep going….In fact I have heard that mothers do not even count that they have a child until it reaches the age of 5 since the chance of the child dying is so great.)

The clinic was dark….we had no power…we arrived wearing our head lamps and in our long African skirts. We took the woman into the clinic, the mother-in-law gathered all their things: grass mats, coloured fabrics, tin kettle and food. She would be providing food for the both of them until the baby came and they walked back to their village just 5km away.

The young girl came in and the midwife allowed me to do most of the work. We did a vaginal exam…my first and frankly I had no idea what I was feeling for but I was told it was 2cm. Then the girl started having loud contractions…I got right into Doula mode(labour coach which I am experienced as). It was amazing for the next 2 hours I supported this woman who only spoke an exclusive tribal African language, by the light of a small lantern. I could see the girl’s eyes change as she would look at me and grip my hand and move around the bed as her baby caused chasms of pain to move through her body. I wiped the beads of sweat from her dark glistening chocolate skin and I placed a cup to her parched lips for her to gather some hydration for the next wave of intensity.

Finally, she started to push naturally; I heard the change- a grunty contraction… within a few we could see head…we moved the bed up a bit I got gloves on and I got into position!

I held the squishy, gooey ball that was emerging to help her body gently release this new life and then as usual it just pops out. I could see the cord was around the neck I just swiftly moved it, it was wrapped twice and then next contraction… I caught my first baby. She was very slippery and bluish red- as they all are. I quickly gave her a bit of a wipe with the African cloth and placed the babe on mom’s chest.

That dark night, I watched a young girl become a mother. In that moment as her face went from pain to pleasure and she looked her daughter in her eyes.

* * *

So back to the show “Lost”. Of course in good Hollywood style the woman goes into labour when the doctor cannot come and sends some ‘unqualified’ woman to catch the baby. Exchange of words was from the laboring mother, “I am afraid” and then the women-now ‘midwife’ “I am scared too.”

Well, I burst into tears and had this memory flood me.

When we surrender our lives to do God’s will we never know what new creation he will give us to catch. There were so many times in Africa when I was afraid or felt alone and yet when I was catching this little baby I did not have any of those thoughts. Africa has changed me in ways I am only starting to see…but here is to feeling the fear and doing it anyways!

The Road Less Travelled by Klara V.

2011-12-20T15:39:03Z

I am being blessed this Christmas season by focusing my eyes on JESUS and only him! I would suggest you try to watch "The Nativity Story a newer movie which looks at the journey of Mary and Joseph. He is dail devotional I have received from an old friend.

December 17, 2011

Some us will well remember a book called "The road less traveled." Right one the first pages of this book it states this: " Life is difficult."

It goes on to say " This is a great truth, one of the greatest truths because once we see this truth, we transcend it. Once we truly know that that life is difficult-one we truly understand it and accept it- then life is no longer difficult. Because once it is accepted, the fact that life is difficult no longer matters.

Mary and Joseph traveled the road less traveled, a life full of uncertainties, many of the old testament prophets and people who are mentioned traveled a difficult road, as did the New testament disciples. As Henry Nouwen writes " they are names of men and women who struggled hard with the powers of evil, sometimes more successfully than others and who experienced love, hatred, joy, pain, reward, and punishment, like ourselves. It is these women and men who form the story in which God Himself wanted to become a part."

For those of us who became Christians later in life,our lives often became more difficult as people no longer invited us to their parties, found us suddenly strange, did not understand, wanted to argue with us, and no longer wanted any part of us. Some got angry that we were baptized and why, was our infant baptism not good enough? Some of lost our marriages and or family members that did not agree with our actions.

Yet for those of us who believe, no matter how lonely and complicated life got when we first believed, found a new way of coping when we slowly started to understand the true reason for Christmas, when most of what we celebrated before started to diminish and as we entered in on a new journey of finding joy and companionship with the One who travels the road with us, our steady companion who never leaves, who is always by our side, who carries us when all gets too much to bear, when we feel sad and when we feel lonely.

And each day He gives us an armor to wear that will protect us, We can securely wrap Jesus all around and about us, and step out knowing He goes with us wherever we go. God travels with us, He listens to us and helps us realize that slowly and surely we are walking towards His house of peace and joy.

Why did Jesus come:

Isaiah 35 : 10
The ransomed of the Lord shall return, and come to Zion with singing; everlasting joy shall be upon their heads; they shall obtain joy and gladness, and sorrow and sighing shall flee away.

Dear father God,
Thank You for this promise, thank for having a future and a hope in You, Thank You as you walk the road less traveled with us in all ways.
Help us to walk with steady feet, with feel fitted with peace and with You wrapped securely around about us.
In Jesus name we pray and believe.
Come Lord Jesus come.

Do I still even like tea?

2011-12-09T15:36:03Z

So Alice is in her most beautiful party dress ever, her mother has pressed it and fluffed her crinoline, her golden strands have been brushed and curled and tied with a matching bow to her handmade, and most treasured dress. “Go play my child, we are having a tea party today, do not get yourself dirty.” Her mother kisses her on her forehead and watches her walk away. Alice just loves tea parties the tea is so sweet and the pastries are so fluffy and with powdered sugar they stick a bit to your fingers which you get to remedy by a quick lingering lick so as to not let any of the experience go to waste.

Alice sets out into the yard, her hands behind her back she is swinging her feet as she steps on the plush green grass. She looks up to the clouds; they seem to dance right before her. She keep wandering further out and now walks under the canopy of the large evergreen trees, the scent of these ancient friends is so deep and alluring, she walks on… “oh look there is a bunny jumping, I think I just saw a buck”. The beauty and the innocence of the forest calls her. Then it starts to hit, a small yawn, “oh that tree looks so strong and yet so welcoming, I will just sit here for a while”, Alice tucks herself in, rests upon the spongy yet dry moss and slowly her eyes close…

When she wakes there is a rabbit…and oh he is much too late…for a very important date!

Alice follows him and before she knows what is happening she is in the hole.

“Where I am ?” She asks.

Before she can get an answer she meets a series of just unbelievable adventures! She has to eat strange things, and speak strange languages; her dress gets dirty and even torn. She meets new people, some she likes and some she does not. She is overwhelmed by joy, fear, adventure, purpose and curiosity. She feels like she belongs yet she longs to be home once again…

AND before she even knows what is happening she lays down to rest and then she hears her mother calling. “Alice! Alice! Where are you? Come my child the guests have arrived and the tea is hot.”

She looks at her dress, it is clean, there is not one snag on it. Not one sign of the ‘hole’. “But…But….But what about the hole? The people, the languages, the land, the suffering, the joy, the friends, the purpose?”

* * *

So all I can say is, “THERE WAS A HOLE!” It was real! But everyone seems to just want me to come to the tea party. I was in Africa in total for 20months. I had two trips starting in Sept 2009 and a 6 month stay in the US with my sister in between. Oh God, there was a hole right?

I have been back in the US for 2.5 weeks now and I think I am starting…just starting to allow the hole to open up and to process what has been my world for the past 2 years. I have tried to join the party, I will get an iphone and I will get new clothing and I will go to church…NOPE!!!

Nope, no iphone for me! Nope, I do need a big wardrobe! Nope, I cannot play church again this Sunday!

Stay tuned and please pray for me as I find a new tea party to attend…

Last African Post- A Collage of Memories

2011-11-20T15:04:25Z

When I think of a collage of photos I think of many colours, of deep memories, and of much diversity…yes this has been my 2011 in Africa

With just 1 more sleep left on this foreign continent I am taking time to reflect back on my 2011…

I have counted 22 different beds I have slept on, 6 different countries I have travelled to and through, 6 different languages I have started to speak…7 times I have taken antibiotics for either a sinus or chest infection. The deepest most alive friendships I have EVER made. Conviction of sin in a new way…the character sin- that when washed away breeds, humility, grace, love, and honesty. I have held three distinct different ministry positions 1) Marketing and Admin in South Africa 2) Project Manager and rural facilitator in Zimbabwe 3) Doctor, Midwife and Cook in Mozambique. Many different fashion styles I have worn. I have learned how to eat REALLY spicy food…I mean Indian hot, hot, hot! have attended an African wedding and a funeral. I have spent more hours than I ever have without electricity. I bought my second EVER car (her name was Thandi and so since I was her mother I was called “NaThandi” by my Zim friends- literally means “the Mother of Thandi”) I sold my second ever car! I have danced more in Church, shed tears of joy and tears and sadness. I have met God in a way I could NEVER have done while at home. I have eaten worms, chicken hearts, chicken gizzards and tried tripe (intestine of cow I think??? YUCK!) I have gotten creative in cooking when you just don’t have access to all the ingredients you want, I have lived in a beautiful neighborhood with colonial style wide streets lined with a canopy of Jackaranda trees(large trees with small purple flowers) - a breath taking site! I have had carbon monoxide poisoning. I have had a torn rotator cuff- Ouch! I have found new grace for aging. I have accepted I am not as strong as I once thought…I like this realization- when I am weak He can be strong! I have swum in the warm Indian ocean. I have given up dreams and I have made new ones…and there is so much more…

Most of all I have made memories I will never forget, I have grow more that I could have ever imagined and most importantly my heart has grown…for Africa, for God, for family, for complete surrender, and for humility.

Thank You Africa and all those amazing people who have crossed my path I am taking a pie of each of you in my heart!

America here I come to make new memories! (A w e… high speed internet and Egg Nog Lattes what could be sweeter!)

CRASH!

2011-11-09T18:23:54Z

A Southern African storm is hard to describe if you have never been in one…if you have you will know what I am about to talk about.

Sometimes- like tonight- it starts with what you think could be the head lights of a car outside your window. The flash is so quick you are not sure if you really saw it or not. Often there is then a period of rest and THEN…

It begins…

The flash of lightening is like a blue streak that actually tends to land on the earth. It is so bright you think there are florescent lights outside the room…It is wide and blue and magnificent!

AND THEN…

The thunder (the rain is yet to come). I cannot tell you what it sounds like when the earth seems like it is going to crack open and swallow you up. You know those thunder sheets they use in movies which rumble and wobble back and forth to make a deep rumbling sound…well picture 3000 of those going for about oh say 5-10 seconds…I just cannot get the point across… you think the walls will be ripped away, you jump with a fright and you actually kinda brace yourself…if there are others in the room you look around to see that everyone survived the crash!

AND THEN…

The rain comes. It is not like Vancouver rain- it is tropical rain, like the sky has really opened up and is just pouring like a faucet, BUT you can hear each drop hit the ground or the tin roof or the palm leaves it is LOUD rain and it is fierce. I can actually not talk in a whisper to my roommate as it is so loud she would not hear me!

AND THEN…

The wind comes. This takes the rain like sheets across the buildings and over the roofs. You can see the gusts of wind carry the rain like fog drifts over a hillside. It pushes it up and down and all around!

BUT…

We knew it was coming… Last night at an evening service held in the dining hall we were visited by swarms of dive bombing flying ants! (not aunts!) these long juicy creatures actually just grow wings for 2-3 hours and then they mate and die…this signals the rains are coming. Last night we were encouraged to sit still and not let these benign, little, annoying, brats to bother us. I personally was not going to have that and took my bible cover and played baseball most of the service as I was protecting my face and my feet where there creepy bodies feel the creepiest when they land and flop around- their wings tickling your nose or the exposed skin on the top of your shoe.

…

So here I sit, the power flickering, the rain pounding, the wind gusting, raising my voice to a low yell to talk to my roommate, while flickers of lightening explode right outside my window! Vancouver here I come!!!!

Humiliated

2011-10-27T10:52:07Z

Yesterday, we were truly blessed at the Zavora Doctors for Life Clinic. A routine visit to a larger hospital to get malaria tests and treatment yielded a 60kg box of medicine being donated to the clinic. We got everything you could imagine! Antibiotics, pain pills, eye ointment, bandages; you name it we got it! On the side of the box one can see that the medicine has been donated from a Belgium donor and it is such a blessing. It has been very interesting for me to be on the receiving end of donations. Personally over the past 2 years I have gone from being a person who had more than enough; who donated my old clothing, sponsored a child in Africa, and gave the odd coin to a homeless person… to being the one who receives these item and how blessed I have been to have been humbled to this place.

I was speaking with the young man (25years) who lives permanently at the clinic with his wife and young baby. They are African/Dutch missionaries from South Africa and this young man has really had a wonderful upbringing with both his parents present, a large Christian family with true Christian values and he has been a source of wisdom for me. He was talking to me about humility and he said, “you must be willing to humiliate yourself”. English is not his first language, so I thought it was a slip in words, yet I felt it was quite relevant to what humility really is…

we must be willing to humiliate ourselves…

When I was back home for 6 months after being in Africa for 10 months, I recall a time when I was at the house of two good friends. I asked them each if they had any unused cosmetics, an old lipstick they were not using or some crème? Low and behold I was so blessed and to this day(thanks Bets) I still am using my ‘donated’ eyeliner. Was I humiliated to ask this request, “hey guys I don’t have much money and you may have what I need and could easily part with it…could you possible offer it up to me?”

Sometimes over the past two years I have been ‘humiliated’ to ask for help, yet it has further humbled me and brought me to a place of compassion and understanding that I could never have gained otherwise. As I look forward to just 27 days left in Africa, I am excited to start my life anew in North America, yet to start I will not have many things and even as I get a job and start to get established I desire the most to stay humble, to be willing to be ‘humiliated’ AND most of all to continue to give to those in need out of the abundance that I know I will have!

Are you willing to be humiliated today?

What does humility look like to you?

Doutora Justine

2011-10-16T09:46:46Z

It is Sunday morning here in Mozambique. I can hear the gentle chirps of the local birds; some so high pitched you can tell it is a baby and others deep and long that you don’t actually hear them after awhile as they blend into the ambiance of an African morning. The weather is cool and moist. We have been getting a quick tropical down pour almost every morning and by mid day the sun has chased away the marine clouds and we are in full fledged African heat! It is a much different heat than what I was used to in Zimbabwe. It is so very tropical and fresh and it cries out for air-conditioning and a lawn chair by a 5 star all-inclusive…alas I am in an old house with a concrete roof(which keeps in most of the heat) at night I sleep under my mosquito net, after spraying my repellant spray, after taking my anti-malaria drugs and my high dose garlic and vit-b tabs to ward away ANY risk!

We are in a very high risk malaria zone and had I planned to be here long-term maybe I would not have taking the drugs, but daily at the clinic we see approx 15 cases of children under 3 with malaria and maybe 5 of adults. Most of the adults having gotten it repeatedly when they were babies are immune to it now, but these precious little ones who come in with 40.5 fevers and are limp like an over cooked spaghetti noodle in their mother’s arms do suffer from one little mangy mosquito bite.

I had no idea what the Doctors For Life Zavora medical clinic would bring for me. A well seasoned missionary now (at least so I think!) I am usually up for anything…

THIS IS THE CLINIC

I had forgotten the dynamics of community living, many cultures working together and of course the all time best…issues with food! I traveled here via truck with the Director of DFL who is Portuguese, Angolan, South African, Mozambequian; and a Russian born, German midwife who is here now to stay long term. It has been interesting to see the role I get to play in the midwife’s life she actually called me her “Aaron” since her English is not good and I am helping to correct her(upon her request!) and I am also able to counsel her with the issues she is having with integrating. It is neat to look back and remember my first few months in YWAM and how I struggled…people were everywhere- I had no space or time to myself! I STRUGGLED and I ate a lot of chocolate! (gotta love comfort eating!) I digress… Now I sit enjoying one of my last 2 Starbucks Green Tea Bags and I know I will be coming home to the “comforts” of home soon…what will home be like? Where will I live? What will I do? Oh the questions are endless, and yet I find myself even closer to God on a daily basis. The same way I was in deep surrender when I met God for the first time I feel I am coming back to this place and it is so very special. I am drawn into reading His word, I am praying deeply and more sincerely, and I am trusting Him for my plans!

This week I actually ‘played’ doctor a lot. I took babies temperatures, I listened to chests to hear bronchitis, I did malaria tests and treated for it and when the doctor was away I was diagnosing and prescribing…when you are surrendered to God and you trust Him with all you heart and soul you can do anything he asks…EVEN when you are not equipped for it!

Here is to week 2 as a ‘nurse, midwife, doctor, sold out for Jesus Servant’ on the cost of Africa in a small town called Zavora!

Sounds of Zimbabwe

2011-10-03T19:03:13Z

The sounds of Zimbabwe are so diverse. It is 6 am and I am sitting in the front veranda and listening to the unique sounds of the local birds. One sounds like a song bird I know; the other has a deep throut kind of caw to it, there is one that chirps high pitched like a bird you would have in a cage at a pet store, then there is the one that sounds like the creaking of an old swing set that has not been oiled in years as the swing would move forward and back, forward and back…

These are not the only sounds which I know so well now; there is the sound of silence too, about 6pm at night right at dusk when the power has been out and the generators not yet turned on and there is a single sound- silence…then the generators start and hum through the streets, some louder and stronger than others. During this time, I think sometimes I can actually hear the sound of the cooking fires of those who do not have generators through the smell of the smoke that fills every part of the air outside. If I am not quick enough to close my bedroom window at this time, when I do, I trap the smoke and some little mosquitors in to rest with me for the night.

I know the deep sounds of a dump truck or a lourie (as they call it in British colonized Zimbabwe), when it roars down the street and then hits a series of pot holes, or more appropriately on a main street a section of road where potholes have been un-evenly filled and there are more like un-intentional speed bumps in the middle of the road.

I will miss the sounds of the languages, the deep clicks and the soft slurring sounds that I strived so had to be able to make. I often find myself over a gas stove waiting for water to boil or while doing dishes just practicing the sounds out loud to myself…NonQaba…Zikhuphani…Busi…Xhosa… I click and knock and slosh my tongue to try to make these foreign sounds.

Not only are there sounds that will stick in my head but the smells are special too. The one smell I will not miss is that of burning garbage; the smell of plastic melting filling the air can sometimes be suffocating. There is the smell of petrol or diesel which sometimes fills all of my senses as well. And this morning there is the smell of ‘spring in the air’. We had our first rainfall of the season last night and I can still smell the freshness of concrete when it gets wet while it is still hot(a smell of childhood actually) and now the beautiful glowing violet Jacaranda trees are in bloom, as well as all the other local flowers and with the fresh rain it is like being in a flower shop!

So in just 2 more sleeps I leave Zimbabwe…

Will it be for good? I am not sure and truth be told no one knows. In this past 2 weeks I celebrated 2 years since arriving in Africa, as well as 3 years since becoming a Christian. When I look back on what has happened in the past 3 years I am actually blown away at who I have become, at where I am going, and at the hope for a future filled with love, integrity, trust, total surrender, dependence on God, and of course GRACE!

I remember about 6 months after becoming a Christian I had a conversation with a non-believer. He was not a Christian and challenged me by saying, “All you Christians are so weak, you surrender that you cannot do life on your own and that you need help…why would I want a part of that?” Well he is right; Christianity, amongst many of its faults- in that it is made up of normal sinful, full of flaws people; is all about surrender…sweet surrender…We cannot do life on our own and many people will turn to a husband or an addition like exercise or alcohol in an attempt to hold onto control. What I am realizing more and more is that to get control you have to give it up! For me this means giving it to God who is there to love me and catch me when I fall, build me up when I am down, teach and discipline me when I am wrong, but most of all to accept me. In this, I am finding an abundance of acceptance for who I am that I could not have grasped in all my years of searching for it.

November 2nd I will turn 32years old. How sweet the growing older is getting…

Making An Impact!

2011-09-13T19:29:35Z

The African Sun and I have a dear relationship. I cannot quite explain it but when I see a sunrise or sunset here, it is different…it is like the sun says to me “I am here, and so are you and you are okay”The rays can unexpectedly pierce my soul and remind me I am here; I don’t necessarily mean physically but that I am in this body…more like I am alive and I am okay. Yesterday I got a wake-up call that I am actually leaving Zimbabwe. It was such bitter sweet news when my visa appeal was denied and yet God is so sovereign in the fact that I have been able to run my project before I go!

For many years I worked hard at building my business and trying to fill my prenatal classes. This would mean I would have 6 couples registered at a time so say 12 people in the class. Week three of our project I did not have to do much to ‘fill’ my prenatal class… I taught how to help the baby to not be posterior and how to do pelvic tilts to many women. In one community I have 100 women in attendance at my “African Bush Prenatal Class”. The class was interpreted by a midwife on my team from my office which helped when I gave the more technical info but I had three local ‘bush’ midwives in the group of women and it was so rewarding to see them asking questions and just eating up the new information.

Demonstrating Some Labour Moves!

Later in the day after eating a big plate of Sadza, greens and beef we continued to hand out more material for sewing the re-usable pads. In the community I work with on Wednesday called Silozwe we started with 34 women and by week three we had over 100. It has been discussed that the rapid and consistent increase in numbers is due to the pads. What was super cool during lunch was when an older women had brought her (clean) underwear to show the other women how the wings on the pad worked. After this she then tried to demo how I had shown to do standing pelvic tilts… which looked like a very large African women gyrating into the air repeatedly… it was hilarious!

I highlight of the project for me was when a Gogo come to me to show me 5 perfectly hand sewn pads and asked for her picture to be taken. She is caring for her granddaughter who has just reached puberty and she was so concerned as to what to do for her as she did not have the money for pads…she now is making these pads for her granddaughter!

On the day I did the prenatal class topics we ended the day with a discussion about miscarriage, still birth, and abortion. The room got very heated about these topics and the facilitator was having trouble controlling the crowd. There were many opinions about how a women should be allowed to grieve and what were the cultural norms ie usually to shove it under the table. I got up interrupted the mayhem and shared the story of my niece who was born after going to heaven last year…I talked about how women need time to grieve and the community needs to support them, I led a time of prayer and with many women with tears in their eyes I felt there was a glimmer of hope in allowing these women who have by circumstance been made so very ‘hard’, to soften a bit…it was a powerful time of ministry for me!

In week 4 we have been teaching about STI’s as well as HIV/AIDS. At the end of the day I shared the stats of how many women in the room would have HIV/AIDS based on the national stats. The women were shocked to find there would have been 12-15 of them who were living with it. It was a time where I could make an honest plea for testing which often comes with stigma when they do find their status, but with access to ARV’s they can live long lives.

Overall the last few weeks have really been a dream...I often find a silent moment while walking a distance to one of the latrines (hole in ground used as a toilet) and in the dusty, dry, hot spring breeze I often look up to see a goat or donkey walking by followed by the deep and hollow sound of its bell; the smell of earth and sun combine with the shaking of tree leaves, and I think… “Me? God did you really choose me for this? For this exact time you gave me the plan and then you called me… and NOW I AM HERE!” I often feel like I have to pinch myself and then… I get to the latrine, smell of sewage, sweat rolls down my back, and then I remember YEP! This is the Africa I have come to love and know, so VERY different than anything you could write home about…it is so hard to capture what it really is like!

Seasons Are Changing...

2011-08-28T13:54:53Z

These were some of our cooks bring in the fire wood!

It is currently starting Spring, and Spring is hot and dry in Zimbabwe. We just went through a time where Winter was ending and Spring was coming- yet it was not hear yet…the mornings were crisp- you could see your breath, but by about 10 or 11 am the sun would be out and it would be hot; a dry hot that you just wish there was air conditioning or at least a breeze to take away the denseness of it. It is interesting when the seasons are changing; that in that transition you don’t really want to be there, you either want to be able to wake up put on a turtleneck and fuzzy socks and stay bundled all day long OR dig deep into the drawer pull out your summer cloths and flip flops and just call it a day…

When the seasons change it is uncomfortable…do I stay warm with my turtle neck and risk it could get hot (and you know it will- but when you are cold in the morning you find that hard to believe) or do you wisely dress in layers and prepare for the inevitable blast of heat that you actually craved so badly during that cold season…

When I heard my Visa appeal for my Zimbabwe work permit had been denied I actually had peace…like I knew summer would be coming and I was sick of the cold winter (metaphorically in my life). I had prayed and said to God if he wanted me in Zim he would approve the Visa and if I was to go home it would be denied…so prayer answered eh?

I have now been back in Zim for two weeks. After a grueling 15 hour bus ride and a 30day Visitor Visa stamp at the border I got back to this place I had been calling home…but not for long…soon I would be, be really GOING home…hmmmmm….

The exciting thing about how your life works if you surrender it to God, is that you know he has a plan greater than anything you could imagine. Two weeks ago my project teaching Sexual Reproductive Health and Gender Based Violence prevention, as well as making of re-usable sanitary pads started. Week one was an intro to Sexual Reproductive Health (SRH)-A highlight for me was during the conversation about dry sex (which is when women put indigenous herbs into themselves to help dry themselves out in an attempt to make intercourse more pleasurable for the man- yet painful for the woman and in fact helps to spread HIV/AIDS and other Sexually Transmitted Infections as the vagina is now more easily torn) and about menopause, I was spurred to stand up and ask the women if they wanted a way to have this ‘tight’ sex without using the herbs and for the Gogo’s to also be able to continue to have a healthy sex life with their husbands…

The answer was a resounding YEBO! (yes in Ndebele!) I taught how to do kegal exercises to these women and they loved it…I hope nothing was lost in the translation to Ndebele but when I sat down they applauded and hollered very loudly…a small seed planted? A piece of fruit starting to sprout?

Teaching the pattern and sewing details as well as handing out or "Pad Packs"

Week two we started to sew the pads. After asking what sanitary wear they use and finding that newspaper gets rubbed to be softened and then inserted like a tampon or old pieces of blankets find their way between the legs of these beautiful, God-created women- they were thrilled to learn they would get the materials to make 12 re-usable sanitary pads each! It was a ball- the old Gogo’s needed their neighbour to thread the needles and then they got going with perfect stitches! The ones who had hit menopause were making them for their granddaughters and the 20-40 year old women- you could see a sparkle of …could I almost call it 'freedom'… in the corner of their eyes as they cut and sewed their personal re-usable pads

The cool thing it that the idea is catching on EVERYWHERE! Many other projects locally are wanting to adopt the idea, women are wanting to take it into the prisons and other communities to help bring this simple idea to help these women who just do not have a sanitary option for something that I see as a human right!

These two sisters walked approx 20km to get to this training and arrived late and asked to be let in...they got busy right away! The older sister guiding her younger... it was priceless!

So God, why did you bring me to Africa? Why did you bring me to the depth of this hot, dry, dusty place called Bulawayo in Zimbabwe, why? Well, I can see that sometimes the question is not about what you give others but about what you gain for yourself. I can see that he loved me so much to call me, to marinate me, to change me, so then I could share that change with others…a secret is that when you serve often the service is to yourself and God knows exactly what you need! Our God is an AWESOME God!

* * *

The Seasons are changing…in less than 3 months I am on a plane back to North America. A piece of me will stay here just like a whole chunk of me stayed in North America when I came…thanks God for choosing and trusting me!